Sheets hanging outside...

This is definitely a cherished moment to be hanging my sheets outside in the backyard. I'm almost tempted to put in a clothesline. Seriously! The smell of fresh sheets dried from the heat of the sun. And the laundry detergent smell of gain. Ohhh.... I'm easily entertained.

Aside from that, I thought I'd mention that just this past trip to Hawaii made the first time Anna heard, seen, used a clothesline. Pins and all. My how time has changed. 

First dinner in Spring. (In the patio)

Pasta! Pasta! Ode to Pasta!

Long and thin like your legs

Al dente pashghetti.

Drizzled olive oil with garlic

The epitome of your soul.

Yes-Light. Green. Pressed. With garlic sizzling.

What an aroma to your corazon.

Add red roma tomatoes. Jubilee!

Throw in some fresh basil why not. And a dash of chipotle! Sprinkle parmessan! Bellisimo!

Ode to mi pasta!

It was our first dinner out back for this year. Spring sure does a number on the soul. Sun setting beautifully over the Oquirrh mountains. A ball game to watch with cheers of excitement bellowing in the background.

Yet nothing could make me more happier than your company. The way you tackle that pasta. Your laughter. The way your dimples flare all over your face. Red sauce gather on the sides of your smile. Feeling the warmth of the sun glistening like a thousand massaging fingers on my skin pressing up on tiny dew drops to pamper me.

Priceless.

Fin.

A Dream With Grandma Anna

Last night I dreamt I was returning.

And my heart called out to you.

But I fear you won't be like I left you.

Me kealoha ku'u home o Kahalu'u.

-Olomana

I woke up from a dream I did not want to end. It was a brief phone conversation with my Grandmother Anna Fanene Leota.

I'm not sure why I called her or thought of calling her, but this is what took place. It's very brief, but time is completely irrelevant in dreams. Only in words when we describe the dream do we find time stretching. Yet makes every feeling very real and precious everlasting.

Me: hello grandma. They're in my house. 

Why?! I didn't invite them, she just let them in.

Grandma: Oe. Tsk tsk tsk.... Kalofae.

(A woman in the group whispers saying it's beautiful, she wonders what the rest of the house looks like)

Me: grandma, they are being so nosy now they're going into the rooms. I have to stop them. 

Before I could get in front of them they were in the two rooms. Wows and aahs were followed in amazement. 

With my phone still to my ear, I said to the crowd, "you will all, will you please exit out and kindly leave. I did not give you permission and before you pass judgment let me say I did not allow you to see my rooms. You have no idea what or why I have done what I have done to each room. Please, leave. Don't make any assumptions because you really don't know or can't begin to know why things are the way they are. Close that door. No it is not a room for a child. He does not exist and not by choice. Please leave. It's something of the past but I could not have. Now please, leave you're starting to aggravate me.

Me: grandma, I'm so sorry you have to hear me like this. Listen, I'll let you go, but I apologize and it was sweet I wish I had more time to talk with you. I'll talk with you again later ok?

Grandma: no.

I laughed. Did you say no? 

Grandma: yes.

Again I laughed. 

Me: I love you grandma.

Grandma: They seem to like what you've done to the house. Let them go with their oohs and aahs. Tell me more Nancy.

Me: grandma? It's been a while hasn't it. 

The dream was of my neighbor Dawn letting a group of elderly people see into my house. She is quite boisterous at times. Often cunning but I'm not sure she either knows it nor cares. To me, it's not a good combination. I think.

But my grandmother seemed to give me the same assurance that I had of my work. It was my little masterpiece. No one could see unless they came inside. Like a plain box on the outside, with a treasure once seen inside. 

I just remembered laughing as she said No. That she'd rather stay on the line and hear me. And I in turn enjoyed the idea that she wanted to stay--- with me. It meant everything, I guess.

Easter Sunday- He is Risen

Salvation cannot be bought with the currency of obedience. It is purchased by the blood of the son of God. - Dieter F Utchdorf. General Conference Spring 2015.

I woke up this morning and realized it was my most favorite Sunday of the year. Easter Sunday. It always brings hope, colors, light, kindness. A benevolent sense of wonder to all of God's creations. An image of Jesus Christ our Savior and the Mary Magdalene on the morning when she saw Christ resurrected for the first time.

I'm always in awe as I wonder why did he visit her first? Whom would I have visited? I wonder if she felt so insignificant and then suddenly of genuine impalpable worth? 

I also think of the woman who washed his feet with her tears and then with expensive oils. I think of the meek and lowly in heart. 

I cannot say I feel this way everyday, but it does every Easter Sunday. 

Watching general conference, the words of one of the speakers were that of never giving up in rediscovering, renewing, and setting forth goals to which we strengthen our belief that Jesus is the Christ. Often times we just believe. And this belief becomes lessened or of little priority in our daily lives. But he encouraged us to renew our beliefs and like renew our goals to know Him once again. To question his very existence when we fall short of knowing Him. I liked that. And will strive to look with vigor each time I find myself in more of a secular mode. I wish you a very Happy Easter Anna. You're growing up and your mind seem more fixed on your iPod. And less on your soul. Perhaps it is part of life.  But when you find yourself in doubt or despair, I hope you can remember how much God loves you. Try to recall how much as a little girl, your spirit was in both worlds. Be happy. Choose happiness above all and you'll never be alone.

Cupcake Wars

You love to talk while watching movies. It's a Robin Williams movie marathon. You love him so much.

We made Nutella Salted Chocolate Cupcakes. Had a bit of a cupcake war. There's 2 things I utterly enjoy. You. And cooking. I'm not the best teacher but I just don't enjoy it unless I have you. It's true. I love you!

Eleven

My Girl. My Earth Wind and Fire- Reasons. My strength. She took this of herself and I absolutely adore her. This is how I see her every single day. A smile in the morning as she walks into my room to give me a big hug and kiss as she "swings around her blousey" each day.

I see you

Curly hair, soft smile, dimples that pop out all over your face the harder you smile.

I see you 

Rolling into a back bend, grabbing your feet from behind. Practicing everyday.

I love you 

For the young little lady you're transforming into.

I love you

For being your best everyday and never compromising your integrity.

reflecting....

Hello Ani,

We are in the month of August and your birthday is just 2 weeks away from tomorrow. Wow my love! You are growing up to be such a fine young lady only a mother such as myself can only be proud. You should be proud of yourself, Anna.

The Summer Olympics this year is held in London, England. We are watching it while we exercise and I must say, it's pretty fun. hahaha... you prefer to watch all the gymnastics. Especially the U.S. girls team which they call the "Fab Five". Our country took gold in the womens team gymnastics. It was so awesome to watch as they blew away the Russians, Romania, China, and Japan. I think it was Japan. Maybe not. But I especially enjoyed watching you get all excited and doing cartwheels and hand stands. We watched the swimmers. Our favorite Michael Phelps and Ryan Lochte swept the gold in the men's freestyle relay and 50m butterfly. I think you would make an excellent swimmer. You have the legs for sure. :) I love watching the women's beach volleyball. Misty May and Kerri Walsh are awesome veterans to the game. I think that's why I love them so much. They aren't the youngins yet they bring home the gold baby. I think it has a lot to do with the way they play as a team. They said in an interview that after the last summer olympics in China, they decided to take an indefinite break/retirement. They both game married to their loved ones. Kerri had 2 kids during that time. And then called up misty to ask if she was in. Misty said no. She was done. So Kerri signed up 4th side nicole and started working up to the olympics. Misty gave Kerri a call and said they had to talk. She told Kerri that she woke up in tears and asked who does that? She realized them that she wasn't done and had some unfinished business to tend to. So Kerri called up Nicole and said "I'm so sorry, I'm about to break your heart..." And the duo got back and is in the London Olympics going for the gold once again. Ani, age plays a big huge factor, however, it goes to show, it is not the MAIN factor in winning and breaking records/goals/dreams. These women are phenomenal! not to mention inspirational.

This past week, you had your swimming and karate. You and I exercised and played out back way into the nights. We talked about everything and anything. Your pet Sugar (shug) guinea pig...Anna, I don't know who loves whom more. You clean her pen all the time, and put her in the little tin pail you got for Easter. And she watches you as you clean her pen and the floor. And she doesn't run out, because you don't know this, but she's bigger then the darn pail you use. It cracks me up with laughter everytime I see her in there waiting for you to hold her and or set her back in her little cage. It's so cute, the two of you. I love when you 2 play the staring game. Last time you won. hahaha! you had to the see your excitement. "I won! Shug, I saw you blink! I beat you baby!" It was so cute because Shug will stare at you to no end! All I can think of is how she is an animal and you are well... human! ha! It's hillarious.

Well, last but not least. This picture of you and I was taken this year. I love it! i hope you do too. You are such a beautiful sight to adore. I love you to infiniti and beyond.

Love, Mama